My Hero

My little sister is one of the most amazing people! She is kind, selfless, caring, patient, and always willing to help. I feel bad because sometimes I get grumpy around her because she is so good at so many things that I am trying to work on myself. But she is always sweet and patient with me.

Sarah has been called to serve in the California, Fresno mission speaking Spanish (exotic, yet domestic)! She flew up to Provo on Friday with my parents. My parents left on Sunday and I got to be my sister's companion for 2 days until she reported to the Missionary Training Center. It was fun to have her tagging along to my class and the different errands I had to run. She took her scriptures with her everywhere and read, because she was determined to finish the Book of Mormon before she reported to the MTC.

I was pretty much in denial the whole time. I kept thinking "she is going to be living literally down the street from my house for 8 weeks while she learns how to teach in Spanish." I just ignored the little detail that I won't be able to see her or speak to her even though she is that close...

We dropped her off at 8am on Wednesday, so I could get to my school by 8:30. That was when it hit me. My baby sister is going on a mission! I can write her letters, but I won't be able to see her for A YEAR AND A HALF. I know it will go quickly, but so many things are going to happen in that year and a half. Moving, medical school.... and who knows what else.

I am so excited for Sarah, she is going to be a fantastic missionary.

Prayer in Schools

After being interviewed by the school administration, the prospective teacher said:

'Let me see if I've got this right.
'You want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, censor their T-shirt messages, and instill in them a love for learning.
'You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride.
'You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a checkbook, and apply for a job.
'You want me to check their heads for lice, recognize signs of antisocial behavior, and make sure that they all pass the final exams.
'You also want me to provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents in English, Spanish or any other language, by letter, telephone, newsletter, and report card.
'You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps.
'You want me to do all this and then you tell me. . . I CAN'T PRAY?'


I love teaching! And it does take a lot of (silent) prayer to get through the day!

Going Nuts in Columbus

So, once again, poor Natalie had to wake up with me way before the crack of dawn in order to take me to the airport. Before we left for the airport, though, I checked our e-mail and saw that I received an invitation from Washington University in St. Louis to interview there on 10/20! That was exciting and I hoped it would prove to be a good omen for the remainder of the trip.

My flight to Columbus was surprisingly uneventful and I waited around the airport for an hour or so for the Leales (our friends. Yes, we do have some! I used to be their home teacher--twice) to come rescue me from the airport. Natalie and I had considered buying them a gift card to Chilis restaurant as a "thank you." However, it's a good thing that we did not go that route because I was sitting right by a Chilis in the airport and doubtless would have consumed the gift card on my own guilty pleasures (the chicken tenders with honey mustard... mmmm....).

Later that night when I checked my e-mail I discovered interview invitation numero dos: from Michigan! So far that day I had been two for two on opening my e-mail and getting an invitation. Unfortunately that easy pattern has been broken the last week or so as I have not heard anything else. Of course, only when Michigan sees me going to interview at their rival's campus would they send me an invitation.... Whatever. I'll deal with them on 11/13 when I go to Ann Arbor for my interview.

It turned out that the following day, the day of my interview, was Jimmy Leale's first day of dental school classes. So I, being the dutiful home teacher, flew all the way out to Columbus so that I could escort Jimmy to his first day of classes and make sure that he got to campus alright. I'm sure if word got out about this it would end up in some inspirational story in the Ensign or General Conference. Anyway, so I walked around campus for awhile. I felt like a little flea walking around the huge campus. I also felt like a tourist taking all sorts of pictures of campus, until I realized that it was the first day of school for all of the undergrad students. So instead of a tourist, I just looked like a helpless freshman taking pictures of his lecture buildings so he can find them the following day (I think I prefer looking like a tourist).

Mirror Lake. This is where everyone jumps in during the week of the OSU-Michigan game. They really are "nuts" here at OSU.

The interview day went pretty well. I got a nifty shoulder bag with a logo on it that basically cries that it, the bag, the user, the user's family, and the user's dog are all property of Ohio State (think I should wear that around Michigan?). There was another BYU student interviewing there, as well, as seems to be the trend. We had several information sessions for the first two hours or so, had lunch, took a tour of the area, and then waited in the conference room for our interviewers to come get us. My first interview was with a med student on the admissions committee. It turns out that he is from Ogden, so he actually knew where Provo is! That interview was only 20 minutes, which was surprising. Up until that interview I had been wondering if I had made a mistake in making my application so unique (emphasizing my Russian background and interests). I thought that maybe I had come across as some sort of freak (which fact I am trying to hide until I am accepted...). However, this interviewer went off about how much he loved my application and personal statement because it was unique and like a breath of fresh air. I had been reviewing it the night before and came across something about my research in Russian literature that I should find a concrete example for. So I came up with one at that time, and then during the interview the interview asked for a specific example of the very thing that I had thought of. Whew! So I felt that it went pretty well overall.

Okay, I didn't actually take this picture, but I like it because it shows the medical center (left side) and the building where my interview day was (front right).

I had a 30 minute break until my faculty interviewer came in to get me. We spent the first couple of minutes just talking about the Northwest and hiking/doing outdoors stuff there. I told him how my brother Bill and I had hiked up to the edge of the crater of Mt. St. Helens and that he should do it too as long as he doesn't fall in and get incinerated. He also said how much he enjoyed my application. He mainly talked about how well-balanced he felt that I was as an applicant and asked me some questions about the various things I've been doing. At the end of the interview (it was about 45 minutes), he went off about how much he loves BYU students. He said that "they are so mature and go on their missions and learn so much about themselves." I tried to be nice and score some extra points for the home team by saying that it says a lot about their program that they value BYU students so much, because it indicates the kinds of values that they focus on. I hadn't really thought about it in that sense until then, and so I started to feel better about the fact that there are so many BYU students there. He also told me how much of a BYU football fan he has become, cheering for the little guy (is that supposed to be a compliment?). He asked, "Who did you guys play last week?" "Uh, Florida State," I replied with a wince. "Oh yeah! That was such a physical game! I didn't know who was going to win until the very end!" It then dawned on me that he was referring to the Oklahoma game, because those would not be the 18 words I would use to describe the FSU game (if you went back and counted those words, shame on you). However, I didn't want to burst his bubble (or get rejected). He also said it was great when we burst into a BCS bowl game a few years ago. This time, not only did I not want to get rejected, I did not want to give Utah any more credit. Anyway, the whole day went pretty well and I came to like Ohio State a lot better than I did before I came.

The Leales showed me around Columbus later in the evening. We went to a German restaurant that had cream puffs the size of my face! I couldn't pass up an experience of a life time, eating one of the 8 wonders of the world, so I had to order one and test my prowess at eating such a monumental conglomeration of fatty acids and carbohydrates.



The next morning I was dropped off at the airport, where I waited for my flight to Houston for my interview at Baylor! I had a great time at Ohio State and had fun staying with the Leales. They showed me the wonders of Columbus and taught me many important things, such as the fact that a "buckeye" is a poisonous nut. Oh well. I guess even though a wolverine may eat it eventually, its victory will be short-lived. I guess that's the strength of a buckeye.

I won't hear back from Ohio State until after 10/16, so after then we'll see if I get in!

Un-cle BRI-AN

One of my favorite pictures from our adventures this summer (taken at the Keldsen's house during the Wright Family Reunion). Paige was absolutely enamored with Un-cle Bri-an.

"Uncle Brian, will you marry me?" --Paige Keldsen

The pen is mightier than the pencil

Today my students made a class book titled "Unfinished Proverbs." I gave them the first half of a common saying and they had to complete it. This is what some of them wrote:

The early bird... wacks up so early.
It's the squeaky wheel that... is squeaky.
A rolling stone gathers... lots of snow.
No news is... a diashish. (I have no idea)
When the blind lead the blind... they get lost.
Too many cooks... bake to much food.
Where there is smoke... it reminds me of whispopping and burping. (whizpopping is passing gas for those of you who haven't read Roald Dahl's The BFG)
Never underestimate... pizza!
It's always quietest... at DEAR. (drop everything and read)
Every cloud has... some rain inside.
Happy is the bride who... marries the best guy.
All that glitters is... underwear. (insert 3rd grader illustration of diamond-studded briefs)

and my favorite:

The pen is mightier than... the pencil.

Music City Mania

So once again poor Natalie had to drop me off at the Salt Lake City airport during the wee hours of the morning so I could make my 7:10am flight. However, apparently everyone else in the area decided to fly out at around that time, as well, since the security line stretched for about a mile. Sadly, I arrived at my gate just after my boarding group started to board, so I had to jump in behind everyone else like a second-class citizen despite the status my boarding pass confered upon me. We changed planes in Phoenix, and then headed to Nashville, TN! Due to my superior punctuality skills I was an "A" boarder, so I got to pick out a good seat on the plane before the majority of other passengers. I picked a good window seat and then tried to puff myself up as big as possible so as to discourage any other potential-seat neighbors from sitting next to me. To my surprise, it actually seemed to be working! People kept walking by me, searching for other seats. When I scared the last guy off (or so I thought), a skinny guy with long hair, I discovered that the people who walked by me were still looking for a seat. So, unfortunately, a large man was forced to sit next to me. I felt like crying out, "Skinny guy! Come back!" because it definitely would have made for a more comfortable flight. So it was at this point where I determined that I am an unfortunate size for traveling. I am large enough that any plane seat I am in is uncomfortable, yet I am not so big as to scare everyone away from me. Oh well.

I knew that I had arrived in Nashville when the first song I heard off the plane was "I should have been a cowboy," sung by some guy in an airport bar. I purchased my round-trip ticket from a shuttle service and waited at the curb for the shuttle to pick me up. Four of us got on the shuttle at first, and then the game of attrition began. One guy accidentally got on the wrong shuttle, and then another guy had not actually bought a ticket yet. So they both got booted off the bus (with a string of curses). The two of us surviving passengers then were finally able to leave the airport! We drove through downtown Nashville (right by the stadium where the Tennessee Titans play!) on our way to the Vanderbilt Medical Center. The shuttle driver explained all of the significant landmarks over the bus' speaker system. Both the other passenger and I were sitting right by the bus driver, so we could have heard him fine even without the speakers. One time I even asked him a question and he answered without using the speakers, and then when he was done answering my question went right back to talking over the speakers.

When I arrived at my student host's apartment, I couldn't find the key he hid for me, so I spent a good 45 minutes snooping around his apartment, peaking through the windows, and feeling under ledges. The whole time I was just hoping that the police wouldn't show up, but then I figured that the neighborhood was shady enough that the neighbors were probably already used to this kind of behavior. I finally found the key, dropped by bags off inside, and then walked around the Vanderbilt campus. I was on strict orders from Natalie to take pictures of the area, so I walked around with my camera like a total tourist. At one point I took a picture of the medical center and then looked over my shoulder. There was a medical student standing there with an evil grin on his face. He said, "It's just a hospital." So I kind of started to feel a little more self-conscious about my camera after that....

The whole campus is a National Arboretum, making it impossible to find your way to class.... The poor confused guy on the left is trying to figure out which path is "the road less traveled" since, apparently, "it (makes) all the difference."

This building puts any building on BYU campus to shame.

My interview the following day (Tuesday) went really well! There were about 12 students or so interviewing overall that day. My interview was scheduled for 9:00am, and so I checked in at the admissions office around 8:15. It turns out that there was another BYU student interviewing that same day! We later pieced together that our wives know each other and that, at one point, we were destined to hang out together. However, those plans fell apart and our destiny crumbled--or rather postponed until 9/15 and again 9/25 at Baylor at two of the randomest of all places. Anyway, so once again, it was interesting to see how well-represented BYU is at these medical school interviews!

The Medical Center. This is where I got humiliated.

An employee of the admissions office escorted me to my interview at 8:55. As we were walking across campus to where my interview would be (in the Children's Hospital), she asked me what I was studying. When I told her I was studying Russian, she asked "Ты говоришь по-русски?" ("Do you speak Russian?" for those of you who don't говорить по-русски... which is probably nearly everyone....). Then she asked if I had served my mission in Russia. I was pretty shocked, but it became increasingly clear that she was a member of the church (the fact that she served a mission in Kiev was what made me begin to suspect this... and the fact that she graduated from BYU-Idaho....). So it was definitely pretty random! I was hoping that it was a sign that everything else that day would be going my way. But was it?

My interview was with a pediatrician lady doctor in her office at their brand-new medical center. The interview lasted about 50 minutes and was the easiest and most laid-back interview so far! The whole interview really was just a conversation. We asked each other some questions, but mainly we were just talking freely back and forth. She asked me the same question that I got in Rochester: "How do you deal with stress?" I gave her the same answer, but this time made it clear that I do not suffer from chronic depression! :) I said that I can handle with external pressure really well but can be susceptable to internal pressures that I put on myself (but it was a much more refined, elaborate, and stunning answer, of course...). I am glad that I told her all of that because she commented that that was a very mature outlook. She was completely different from the last interview lady at Rochester--she actually smiled and laughed a lot during our interview! I almost started laughing when she asked me "What three words would your wife use to describe you?" When Natalie was driving me to the airport Monday morning, I asked her this very question because I knew it was a possible question that might come up. So I was just like, "Well, I don't know why, but I'm pretty sure she would say...". : ) Natalie definitely helped me score some major points, not only for the nifty words but also because the interviewer has a 3rd grade child, and so she loves 3rd grade teachers (something we had in common! Although, my interest there is only in the singular). She also laughed when I told her the story of Natalie teaching me violin lessons and how it seemed that I was totally just wanting to crawl back into Natalie's life. However, for the record, that was not the case. Well, not completely.

Overall, the interview went really well. My only potential stumble was when I was explaining what I meant by "efficient" (one of the words Natalie used to describe me). Initially I said that I was efficient in my school work. Then the interviewer asked, "Would she mean that you are efficient in allocating your time between school, church, and work? That you are able to find time to spend with her despite your varying responsibilities? That when you are home to be with her, you really are home to be with her?" I was just like, "Uh, yeah. Exac--exactly." So she threw me a bone there and totally answered the question for me! I will definitely have to use that answer next time. At the end of the interview, she seemed really happy and said that she had really enjoyed talking to me. So it was really well.

They took us on a tour of the medical center later on in the day (which is very nice!), and then another applicant and I had to leave early to catch our flights at the airport. I thought this other applicant already had a ticket for the shuttle, but I found out as we got on the bus that he did not. He did not have any cash, and the driver could not accept his credit card. However, she did not learn that he didn't have any cash until after we had left. So we drove around downtown Nashville looking for an ATM. We finally found one, but it wouldn't accept his card (stupid U.S. Bank). By this time he was starting to freak out because he didn't know how else he would get to the airport. I was sitting right behind the bus driver, so I leaned forward and asked her, "When we get to the airport, will you let him run into the ticket counter and by a ticket there with his card? You can hold onto his luggage so you will know he will bring the ticket back to you. That would make everyone happy." I was trying to stick up for the kid (it's amazing how much older a mission makes you as an applicant... everyone is so much younger!). However, apparently I am a better negotiator than I give myself credit for, because she ended up just letting him ride for free as long as we promised not to tell a soul. We zipped up our mouths and made it to the airport just in time to catch our flights.

The flight back went almost without incident (are any of my travels ever free of that?). I made the mistake of sitting in the row in front of the emergency exit row, so my chair would not recline. I then started to hope that whoever sat in front of me would not lean their chair back, or else I would be smooshed like many of the bugs that used to frequent our apartment! A lady (with a very thick southern accent) sat in the seat in front of me and her mom sat right next to her. The lady had a pillow with her and was telling the whole plane how she was going to sleep the whole way. I braced for the worst. However, I was pleased to see that for the first 20 minutes she didn't lean her seat back (I don't think she knew it reclined). Her mother, unfortunately, eventually leaned her seat back. I froze. A couple seconds later, the lady leaned her seat back, smashing me up against my lap top. The only thought that flashed through my mind was, "You're a bad example to your daughter, ma'am." So my flight back to Las Vegas was not one of luxury.

Then, as I was waiting for my flight from Las Vegas to SLC, I was facing the wall as I picked up my luggage and prepared to sit closer to my gate. As I picked up my bags, I heard someone behind me say, "Hey, you were my Genetics TA!" So it turns out that there was another BYU student coming from an interview, and I happend to be his old Genetics TA (I didn't know who he was). I had no idea that such a position would endow me with such immortality and glory. I had been looking forward to getting some homework done, but instead got stuck talking to him for 30 minutes. Then he called his wife to check in, and the first thing he said was, "I tried sending you a text message from 30,000 feet, but it wouldn't send for some reason." I thought he was joking at first, but realized that he was serious when his wife started chewing him out over the phone and he tried to defend himself. At that point I started to scoot away towards my place in the boarding line. Sweet Natalie picked me up, and my wonderful Vanderbilt adventures came to an end!

I really hope that I get accepted to Vanderbilt, as it seemed like an amazing place. Hopefully, if I do get accepted, I will get a lot of financial aid from them, as they give out pretty generous scholarships to some students! I fly out to Columbus, OH this Tuesday for a Wednesday interview at Ohio State, and then fly to Houston on Thursday for a Friday interview at Baylor. Quite the road trip! These are my last interviews for a while though, so Natalie will finally be able to get some sleep after this week!

The Return of Shelob

One day recently Natalie and I were returning home from a long day in the real world of work and toil when the real adventure of our lives began (Read on at your own risk-- it gets pretty graphic). We walked up the steps into our stairwell when Natalie suddenly stopped. I was completely oblivious to everything around me (except Natalie, as always) and would have walked right into the trap if Natalie had not stopped. On the wall near our door was the biggest spider we had ever seen! We recognized it instantly from the blockbuster movie "The Return of the King" as the one and only Shelob, fully healed after her battle with Samwise Gamgee.












Can you see the resemblance?


It was pretty nasty. We stayed as far away from it as possible while we snuck into our apartment. Fortunately, it didn't pounce on us yet. Natalie armed me with the bug poison sprayer of death and then sent me out to do battle with the dreaded arachnoid (she followed me out with the camera to document our victory, finishing what Samwise the Brave failed to do).

None of us wanted to get particularly close to the monster, so we stood aways away and I doused the creature with poison for a good couple of minutes.

Apparently Shelob didn't think too highly of our actions, as she started to try to outmaneuver the stream of death that was soaking her by the second. Fortunately my aim was steady and true and so she couldn't shake me. However, after a couple of minutes we got tired of using the spray, and so I tossed it aside, grabbed a broomstick, and prepared to enter the arena of death and engage the spider mono y mono. Okay, I still had a broom, but she had 8 legs! And fangs! And that poison thingy! Luckily for me, I struck first.
This knocked the Terror down onto the mat right infront of our neighbors' door. Knowing that there were children inside, I didn't back down from the evil that was only a couple feet away from me. I took a big wind up with the broom and brought it down right on top of the merciless monster's head (and body and legs and poison thingy...). Apparently if only Sam had been standing above Shelob with a broom, he could have defeated her pretty easily in the movie. But that would have made a pretty lame scene. Anyway, thankfully that deft stroke finished off the creature, as she rolled over onto her back, curled her legs up, and gave up the ghost.

My death blow to Shelob was so mighty that our neighbor even came out to see the brave hero who finished her off. Well, on second thought, he was probably coming out to investigate what the big WHACK! was right outside his door. Regardless, we showed him the remains of the spider and we all marveled at the presence of such a monster in our stairwell. As victorious heroes often do, we discarded her carcass in the grass for the wild dogs and fowls of the air to feast upon. Wymount will sleep safely tonight thanks to the heroic efforts of two seemingly-ordinary residents.